Such a treat they are! The CDC has issued its guidance about Halloween. Masks are bad!

“Attending a costume party held outdoors where protective masks are used and people can remain more than 6 feet apart
A costume mask (such as for Halloween) is not a substitute for a cloth mask. A costume mask should not be used unless it is made of two or more layers of breathable fabric that covers the mouth and nose and doesn’t leave gaps around the face.
Do not wear a costume mask over a protective cloth mask because it can be dangerous if the costume mask makes it hard to breathe. Instead, consider using a Halloween-themed cloth mask.”

Sooooo…plastic costume masks are bad news, but the cloth masks are fine for Halloween. What in the wide world of logic is this??!! The Covid virus can go through plastic better than it can go through CLOTH??!! I can’t even with this.

Oh, but that’s not all. It seems that there are acceptable “low-risk activities.”

“Carving or decorating pumpkins with members of your household and displaying them
Carving or decorating pumpkins outside, at a safe distance, with neighbors or friends
Decorating your house, apartment, or living space
Doing a Halloween scavenger hunt where children are given lists of Halloween-themed things to look for while they walk outdoors from house to house admiring Halloween decorations at a distance
Having a virtual Halloween costume contest
Having a Halloween movie night with people you live with
Having a scavenger hunt-style trick-or-treat search with your household members in or around your home rather than going house to house”

Follow the above logic for a minute. People can plan for kids to have a scavenger hunt in the neighborhood as long as they admire everything from a distance. Which means the scavenger hunt is on the streets and sidewalks because heaven forbid any scavenger hunt items end up within 6 feet of those dangerous Halloween decorations that the homeowner touched! Has anyone at the CDC ever been involved in a scavenger hunt? I guess not given these guidelines. 

No more haunted houses, and those hayrides are shaping up to the the worst thing in the world! I guess that means socially distanced corn mazes are out of the question. Oh wait, you CAN go to a corn maze, or to an outside haunted house, but make sure to maintain DOUBLE the distance between you and other people in case someone screams. 

As for Trick or Treating or even Trunk or Treating, forget about it. It is horrifyingly high risk don’t you know. Cute little kids walking up to the door, pressing their grimy germ-laden fingers on the door bell, holding out their Halloween buckets and lisping ‘Twick or Tweet!!’ through their CDC mandated cloth mask is an absolute no-go. The virus is just laying in wait to pounce you guys. 

So, what are kids and parents going to do about trick or treating? Station the kids at the end of the driveway and have people drive by (with masks on I presume) and throw disinfected candy at the kids? I know! How about a candy chute!

Wanna bet the guy got the idea from Willie Wonka? Amusingly and sadly, some people thought there was still a risk of virus transmission …through the candy chute! Yeah, I know. Cue all the face palms. 

This is the time of year when we start seeing Halloween cancel culture scolds show up. I’ve a feeling their scolding will be ramped up to nuclear scale because VIRUS! 

The fallacy of what the CDC is proposing is deep and wide here. Especially with additional “science” regarding masks that is out. 

https://twitter.com/PrimePrincess13/status/1308395015970926593

Exactly. Protests that involve ZERO social distancing with masks as a suggestion are absolutely fine. Swarming a restaurant patio and screaming at diners is completely acceptable. Hay rides and trick or treating is not. 

So the CDC is recommending no Halloween this year for the kids, no trick-or-treating.

Isn't that the one day of the year when everyone is encouraged to wear a mask?

Now the masks don't work?

Or are we just canceling childhood along with canceling death?

— Two If By Sea (@WhyNotMeToo2) September 22, 2020

Our kids have had their childhood yanked out from under them with this Covid mess. Birthday parties, graduation parties and prom were canceled because it is so dangerous. Now, by the CDC’s logic, the virus is much more dangerous on Halloween than it is with the rioting protests. And those Halloween masks are killers. 

Feature Photo Credit: pumpkin photo via Pixabay, cropped and modified