Sunday Morning Cafe Cocktails

Sunday Morning Cafe Cocktails

Sunday Morning Cafe Cocktails

Mimosa, Bloody Mary, nice flute of champagne — or maybe a favorite tipple in your coffee. Make yourself one and, as Dorothy Parker once said, “If you don’t have anything nice to say, come sit by me.”

Thank you for joining me this Sunday, yet again. [slides you a flute of champagne] My habit is to keep a little list of things that pique my interest during the week and then snicker and guffaw over them with you. And, my oh my, this week held a veritable bounty of absurdity. Cheers and let’s begin.


Robert Reich throws a tantrum over the debt ceiling

Bill Clinton’s ugly little garden gnome, Robert Reich, demands DEMANDS you stop worrying about the debt ceiling, you ignorant proles.

HOW DARE YOU! — oh, wait. That’s Greta Thunburg’s line. You know, the world’s other toxic gnome. They’re about the same size, so forgive my confusion. I must remember that Robert is the one with a beard.

This is eleven years old — but a clearer (and more darkly funny) bit of explanation theater has yet to be made.


How tax dollars really work

A staple of late night comedians everywhere has been looking at government spending and exposing the say what? abominations in budget items. Laughing about $500 toilets for the military or grants to study the sex lives of gnats. *Free money* attracts grifters and no more so when it is Woke grifting.

The Research Council of Norway is spending over $1.2 million USD on a project that is dedicated to discovering how the country has contributed to the spread of “whiteness” globally, through colonialism and through paint.

Wait, what … paint?

“Although Norway is not a conventional colonial power, this project will show how the country has played a globally leading role in establishing white as a superior color,” the brief continues, without explaining what an “unconventional colonial power” might be. (snip)

The state-funded project went on to describe how Norwegian chemists revolutionized white paint in 1916, developing a form with far better coverage and opacity than was previously used. Thus, many notable buildings around the country were painted bright white. (snip)

They went on to spell out a clear objective: find out how Norway “made the world whiter.”

DROP THAT CAN OF BLANK CANVAS, racists. It’s the only way to atone for your dastardly aesthetic.

Excuse me, dears. I need to order something stronger than champagne. How about a bottle of Maker’s Mark and a couple of shot glasses? You game?


Meddlers gonna meddle

It used to be “Mrs. Grundy” but she wandered into the fog and the Karens took over. And in their hypersensitive world on the lookout to take offense at just about anything, they have come to the conclusion that even cake is offensive. From our friend, David Thompson.

In dangers-of-the-workplace news:

If nobody brought cakes into the office, I would not eat cakes in the day, but because people do bring cakes in, I eat them.

The grown adult quoted above is Professor Susan Jebb, employed by the University of Oxford to think deeply on matters of diet, and current chair of the Food Standards Agency. For our disapproving academic, the workplace is akin to a “smoky pub,” due to the occasional presence of cake, and therefore conjures – in her mind, at least – notions of “passive smoking.”

You may believe that Leftists only live to suck the living daylights out of any joy in life, but the naming and shaming the baby shower cake in the breakroom is a jar of sprinkles too far even for them. Yet, understand Ms. Jebb has her supporters.

You menacing office feeders? You’re on notice from the food nannies. We expect celery sticks and kale chips from you, or nothing at all.


Your Sunday Smile

In a world of unforced rudeness, casual cruelty, and the unchecked aggression of the insane, an act of simple kindness is both miraculous and worthy of celebration. Grab some tissues.


So glad you made room in your day to join me. Until next Sunday, stay happy and watch out for gnomes. Cheers!

featured image, original graphic by Darleen Click

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