Salon Needs a Spanking

Salon Needs a Spanking

Salon Needs a Spanking

I know it’s out of favor to support corporal punishment, however I for one am in the minority view that it serves a useful purpose.  When I was just a wee lass, I suffered from the human condition of covetousness.  My father had given me and my older sister a pack of flavored gum.  He gave me an orange flavored pack and my sister a peppermint flavored pack.  Of course, I wanted both and took hers.   As siblings are wont to do, she totally sold me out and I was placed on my father’s lap for confession.  I lied my little butt off and proclaimed I was chewing my own gum.  He had one request for me.  “Let me smell your breath.”  The gig was up.  Liar, liar, pants on fire!  Thus I was folded over my dad’s knees for a good spanking.  While he assured me that he loved me, he also let me know that the punishment was less for the stealing and more about the lying.  And so I come to my proclamation that Salon Magazine needs a spanking, They are lying liars and need to be punished for gaslighting all who read Matthew Rozsa’s article suggesting Kamala Harris is the most powerful VP since Richard Nixon.  I $#!* you not!

According to the grasping-for-straws journalist, the sole qualification to hang the “Most Powerful Veep EVER” medal around Kamala’s wrinkly little neck is because… wait for it…

“Harris has cast 15 tie-breaking votes in less than 11 months, with the most recent coming on Dec. 8, more than twice as many as any previous first-year vice president. Second place, in fact, belongs to Mike Pence, who cast six tie-breaking votes in his first year; so the conclusion that this phenomenon is related to the stark political polarization of our era seems irresistible. “

Yes, you read that correctly!  In the game of rock, paper, scissors, she has been able to win two out of three times more than any VP other than John C. Calhoun!  I’ll stop and let you quit Googling all those facts.  But yes, our venerable VP has indeed been the deciding factor in the perfectly split Senate.  If all that is true, then why my rant for a spanking?  ‘Cause even the Salon writer undercuts his own gaslighting message with the subsequent paragraph!

“Harris claiming Pence’s trophy resulted in a minor media moment and she was a good sport about it, joking, “Every time I vote, we win.” Yet the actual votes are somewhat surprising: Twelve of Harris’ 15 tie-breakers were on nominations, two involved budgetary matters and one was on President Biden’s emergency COVID-19 stimulus bill. With that last exception, these were all mundane matters of governance, not major policy decisions.”

But the last paragraph is the one where a spanking is due.  After a rambling backstory about Nixon’s political prowess, Rozsa wraps up his ridiculous piece with what he must know is pure Pravda-like propaganda!

“During his eight years as vice president, Nixon was seen as a hatchet man with real-world toughness who went to town on the Republican Party’s opponents — even though he had no real power. (Except for the tie-breaking vote: He cast just eight of them.) Kamala Harris is well on her way to becoming the most influential vice president of all time — at least in narrow constitutional terms. Whether or not she can use her inconsequential office the way Nixon did — to build a forceful reputation, accumulate political power and position herself as president-in-waiting behind an elderly incumbent — remains to be seen.”

Yes, it is clear that Matthew Rozsa got the Whitehouse memo to act as the Greek Chorus for the Administration.  Yet, if Kamala is the powerful politician placed in a powerful post, why is Charlamagne Tha God asking Who’s the Boss??

Look, Salon Magazine isn’t the only one who should get a spanking for lying to the public about how awesome Harris is at her job.  Here’s another member of the Greek Chorus AKA Washington correspondent trying to cover for her:

Look, given the fact that Biden really can’t do his job, it isn’t surprising that he threw Kamala under the bus and gave her all the crap assignments he should be responsible for.  According to Christan Science Monitor, here is a small list of responsibilities he has given her:

  1. Mitigating immigration (wink wink)
  2. Touring the country to “defend” voting rights (which would require killing the filibuster)
  3. Shilling the COVID-19 vaccine (that Kamala single handedly undercut in the early days)
  4. Touting the National Space Council (I’m sure many of you have seen the cringe-worthy video!)

How’s that working out for her?

Spanking VP Harris as “Border Czar!”

The border crisis is at an all-time high and the Guatemalan president says he hasn’t heard from her since June:

“President Alejandro Giammattei claimed to Fox News that he hasn’t heard from Harris since she visited Guatemala City in June as part of a rocky trip to discuss the “root causes” of the continuing immigration crisis at the US southern border.”

Spanking VP Harris as Voting Rights Champion!

Between Kyrsten Sinema and the most powerful politician in politics today, I have high hopes that Kamala will find herself sold down the river on this task too.  From a June article in the Charleston Gazette-Mail, Joe Manchin tells it like he sees it:

“I believe that partisan voting legislation will destroy the already weakening binds of our democracy, and for that reason, I will vote against the For the People Act. Furthermore, I will not vote to weaken or eliminate the filibuster. For as long as I have the privilege of being your U.S. senator, I will fight to represent the people of West Virginia, to seek bipartisan compromise no matter how difficult and to develop the political bonds that end divisions and help unite the country we love.”

Spanking VP Harris as the Vaccine Voice!

During the campaign season of 2020, Senator Harris was quick to suggest that any vaccine created under the Trump administration might be questionable.  During the Vice-Presidential debate, it was this suggestion the got mild-mannered Mike Pence to snap back:

“The vice-presidential candidates’ debate was Harris’s highest-profile appearance of the campaign. She took the opportunity to explain that she would not get a vaccine pushed by Trump. That is what got the habitually placid Pence’s dander up. He turned to Harris and memorably admonished, “Stop playing politics with people’s lives.”

Spanking VP Harris as the face of the NSC!

This tweet speaks for all of us:

https://twitter.com/brandonfrank09/status/1470950915054133252

So, while I know that it not physically possible to bend the MSM and the cronies who do the bidding for them over my lap.  I wish we could.  Kamala Harris is currently polling around 28%.  That’s lower than her boss (rare for a Vice President).  Kamala polls lower than even mass media, which is roughly tied with Biden’s dismal 38%.  Therefore, I think Salon’s attempt to snow their readership with the flimsy basis of breaking Senate stalemates deserves a spanking.  I know Salon’s readership is gullible, but even I don’t think they are dumb!

Featured Image: “Big Spank #1” by panavatar is licensed under CC BY-NC-ND 2.0, cropped, and modified.

 

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4 Comments
  • Scott says:

    ” I know Salon’s readership is gullible, but even I don’t think they are dumb!”

    C’mon Cameron…. NEVER underestimate the left!

  • American Human says:

    “How do we know…?”
    It is hard to comprehend how stupid this woman is. How do we know it is charging if we can hear the guzzling sound?
    This person is so far out of her ken that it is almost impossible to comprehend it.
    I have a suggestion for her. She can tell how charged the batteries are by putting her tongue across the electrodes when she’s finished. If she get her tongue permanently damaged, then its fully charged. If her tongue heals after about six weeks, then it was not fully charged.
    Maybe she’ll understand that?

    • Scott says:

      Not sure if it was your intent, but that test would seem to play to Kamala’s talents… (at least according to Willie Brown)

  • CaptDMO says:

    Corporal punishment out of favor?
    Dr. Spock was in error.
    May I present Gen x onward?

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