Whether we like it or not, America is a culture that loves celebrities. And where there are celebrities, there are enormous egos who often start epic feuds.

From the 1940’s until the 1960’s a legendary feud reigned between screen queens Bette Davis and Joan Crawford. In the 1990’s rockers Axl Rose and Kurt Cobain had it out for each other. Most recently pampered pop princesses Katy Perry and Taylor Swift have carried on their own passive-aggressive cat fight.

But now a feud has emerged between two antagonistic bros that actually could result in fisticuffs. You know, mano a mano type stuff.

There’s really bad blood right now between Medal of Honor recipient Dakota Meyer and Instagram celebrity Dan Bilzerian.

We all know about Meyer and his courage. However, if you don’t know who Bilzerian is — and I didn’t, until this weekend — well, let’s just say he’s less honorable than Dakota Meyer. A lot less. He grew up wealthy, and has lived off a trust fund from his father, a corporate raider and white-collar criminal. Bilzerian tried but failed to become a Navy SEAL. However, this “King of Instagram” shamelessly promotes himself as a gun-toting tough guy who is irresistible to women. Bilzerian even once bragged that his “greatest fear” was that “someone will break in and I won’t be able to decide which gun to shoot them with.”

Yet at the Las Vegas music festival last week when a gunman fired into the crowd, the macho man ran. However, he also thought it would be great publicity to record and post a profanity-laced video. In it he also described in graphic detail one young woman’s head injury.

https://youtu.be/jP6YTixSId0?t=6s

Well. Dakota Meyer was appalled. So he responded to Bilzerian on Instagram:

“This is why children shouldn’t classify heroes by their followers or their photos. @danbilzerian this is what kills me about people like you. Always playing “operator dress up” and so so tough when the cameras are on. A woman just got shot in the head and you are running away filming that’s not what operators do. Please stop trying to be someone your not. People are dying, you’re running away not helping them and pretending it’s worthy of a video is disgusting.”

And, just like that, the fight is on! Ding, ding, ding — to your corners, gentlemen!

Bilzerian claimed that he returned to the scene to fight back.

However, those dastardly police refused to just hand him a weapon. Right, like that was going to happen. I mean, didn’t those dumb cops know whom they were dealing with?

And then Bilzerian turned his rage upon Dakota Meyer, calling him a “retard.” He also said he was a ‘blogger’ desperate for ‘five minutes of fame,’ which is really hilarious coming from the likes of Bilzerian:

However, it didn’t end there. Meyer’s wife, Bristol Palin — yes, daughter of Sarah — began receiving prank phone calls. And that’s when the dog-doo really hit the fan.

Meyer accused Bilzerian of publicizing Bristol’s phone number. Then he threw down the gauntlet:

So, has Macho Man Bilzerian answered Dakota Meyer? Did he take up his challenge?

As of this writing — uh, no. However, should this feud come to actual blows, my money would be on Dakota Meyer. While serving as a Marine in Afghanistan, Dakota Meyer drove a Humvee directly into the line of fire during a battle in 2008. Dan Bilzerian, on the other hand, has been accused of attacking porn stars.

Furthermore, Dakota Meyer is determined to protect his wife. And in this day of wacky feminists and rap stars who call women ‘hoes,’ it warms my old-fashioned heart to see a man resolved to defend the woman he loves. What true blue American girl wouldn’t love that?