Last week, anti-Capitalist-Capitalist and NFL has-been, Colin Kaepernick was hyping up his new Nike shoes. This week, Kaepernick has turned foreign policy advisor to only get tackled multiple times.

It all started with this little ditty:

There is nothing new about American terrorist attacks against Black and Brown people for the expansion of American imperialism.

— Colin Kaepernick (@Kaepernick7) January 4, 2020

It’s our guess that Kaepernick did not study what actually led up to the Iranian Revolution in 1979 or any of the events that transpired afterwards. But, this was way before Mr. Kaepernick was even a twinkle in 1987. And we couldn’t possibly expect him to have learned about this within the school systems in his VERY white neighborhood of Fond du Lac, Wisconsin (88% white). They didn’t tackle this subject matter, I’m sure. Kaepernick couldn’t even be bothered to watch a video that is under two minutes long to give him all of the information he needs to know before spouting off.

Nevertheless, Kaepernick doubled down with yet another tweet:

America has always sanctioned and besieged Black and Brown bodies both at home and abroad. America militarism is the weapon wielded by American imperialism, to enforce its policing and plundering of the non white world.”-Colin Kaepernick

And…the defense comes in for the tackle:

For one, Kap, if you think that the Iranians are sitting around angry and shaking their fists at their Imperialist Overlords, you are sadly mistaken.

Prior to the Revolution, Tehran was a thriving bustling secular world capital. They are an oppressed people, but not by us!

— Sam (@h1x_sam) January 4, 2020

Didn’t teach that at University of Nevada, did they?

Man, I keep looking for that tweet you made about the Uighur people in those Chinese concentration camps and I can’t seem to find it. 🤔 #Nike

— Abby Johnson (@AbbyJohnson) January 4, 2020

Where are your Nike kicks assembled again, Colin? And how much a pop are you selling them for? Oh, yeah. That’s right. Portions of the sales go to fund organizations helping “black and brown” oppressed individuals here in The United States. Doesn’t matter Asians in China and Vietnam were oppressed in the Nike factories responsible for making them! Right. Gotcha.

Your local Recruiter is waiting for his majesty to ENLIST and show us all how it should be done🇺🇸

Our men and women in uniform have more character, class, and courage than you will ever dream of having!

— Graham Allen (@GrahamAllen_1) January 5, 2020

I’m not sure who is expecting Kaepernick to have an ounce of class, ever, or courage for that matter. Enlist, show up and go to a boot camp? The guy could not even properly show up to a practice at the proper venue.

Your parents are literally white. Did they enforce any imperialism on you spoiled little brat? #Loser pic.twitter.com/AoPxoX7d1C

— Erika Garcia (@kinni00) January 5, 2020

Tackled.

Suffice to say, Kaepernick has been tackled on his multiple attempts at a woke-as-a-joke touchdown. Tackled because of his dizzying intellect, no doubt. In Colin Kaepernick’s world, killing a top general of forces in Iran who has collaborated with Hezbollah and Hamas (just to name a few) is bad for “black and brown” people. Side bar: Do Iranians even call themselves “black and brown people”?! Sacking a top Iranian general who was largely responsible for killing innocent protestors (facing legitimate oppression) and American service members is bad. Taking action against a country that has blatantly lied to us multiple times and was taken at its word by at least two feckless administrations is “American imperialism”? Jimmy Carter took Ayatollah Sayyid Ruhollah Mūsavi Khomeini at his word to have revolutionaries break into the US embassy in Tehran. Barack Obama kissed Iran’s ass and sent Iran U.S. dollars to fund their continued efforts to “defeat the great satan“. Imperialism, much, Kaeps? How many “oppressed” Americans would $400 million feed and educate, anyway?

So, if you believe in something, even if it means sacrificing everything, Colin…perhaps you should pack up your life in “Imperialist America” and move to Iran? I hear they really like your type there. You can chant “Death to America” but they *may* have a problem with the whole shoes-for-profit-celebrity-endorsement-thing and your unfiltered Twitter feed and you may have to check with the powers-that-be before you open your big, uneducated mouth about something you know very little about.

Photo Credit: FlickR/Creative Commons/Attribution-ShareAlike 2.0 Generic (CC BY-SA 2.0)