Were you lucky enough to catch Miley Cyrus’ cringe-worthy performance at the MTV Video Music Awards this weekend? If you missed it, go ahead and check it out here. You might want to keep a bottle of bleach nearby.
If you felt disgusted, horrified, or embarrassed for Miley, then fear not: you aren’t alone. Virtually everyone who watched that monstrosity felt the same way. The reaction was instantaneous, loud, and overwhelmingly negative.
Clearly, this means that every feminazi in existence must crawl out from underneath their rock to defend her find another excuse to whine hysterically about PATRIARCHY and SLUT SHAMING. Because that’s what happened, y’all. America’s prudes just couldn’t handle a woman expressing her sexuality on stage!
For anyone paying attention to Miley’s Twitter presence for the past week or so (she’s been hyping the VMAs like crazy), or anything at all that she’s done lately, her performance shouldn’t have come as a surprise. But outside of Miley, no one should be surprised that the sexuality of a young girl managed to outshine Kanye West singing a song about lynchings, Drake doing his Drake thing, NSYNC reuniting, Katy Perry pretending to be Million Dollar Baby and even Lady Gaga, a woman who traditionally does the outshining as reigning Queen of the Weird. The VMAs have a long and prestigious history of women doing crazy sexual things onstage, more so than any other awards show, perhaps because it’s not really an awards show but a spectacle. Madonna, Britney Spears, Madonna and Britney Spears — the VMAs is an event where everyone feels like they should push the envelope, and sex is the best way to do that.
… Cyrus’s performance was shocking, but for reasons not being discussed. It was jarring because, as opposed to the random, half-nude models we’re used to seeing prance around Robin Thicke, we were watching a 20-year-old woman — a household name, someone we “know” — play the object in Thicke’s sexy sex dream. And as was the case during the Janet Jackson/Justin Timberlake Super Bowl fiasco of 2004, the focus has been on Miley’s performance choices and not Thicke’s compliance in them. While criticizing a woman for her actions might imply that she’s being given an agency that has been long denied, it’s not. It’s holding her to a standard not required of her companion, who got to sit back and enjoy the young ass shoved in his face. Whether Cyrus was doing it somewhat ironically (she didn’t exactly look sexy most of the time; the tongue wagging and pigtail buns were almost comical) doesn’t seem to matter. Her lack of clothes and movements spoke stronger than anything else.
Yes, yes, I know you want it—to feel scandalized. But may I offer an alternative, one that may be less immediately exciting but ultimately more fulfilling? Try not caring. Step back and really look at the performance. If it were anywhere but the VMAs, we would not be that interested in a mediocre pop star in a beige bathing suit rattling her butt at Alan Thicke’s son in an inept attempt at eroticism. We certainly wouldn’t call it “X-rated.” If you want to see something actually sexy, try porn. Or HBO. Or just wander into any dance club in any major city and see people who can dance better than Cyrus and actually make it hot.
It seems that we still can’t handle what it’s like for a young woman to be able to perform, as she chooses, without layering in a heavy helping of insults as well. While Cyrus was condemned for grinding on Thicke, very little criticism has been laid on the singer himself for his role in the performance. The nastiest of the comments have implied that Cyrus is somehow diseased because of her preferred dance methods.
It’s impossible to consider her performance without noting the following: 1) a 36-year-old Robin Thicke, standing onstage while Cyrus gyrated around him; and 2) the use of women as props and accessories, a habit that practically defines music industry productions. Usually, though, the people using women thus are men. At the VMAs, Cyrus expressed her celebrity and power pretty much the way the most visible and prominent men in her industry do. And while she deserves some criticism for her performance, the kind she’s likely to get is deeply linked to her gender.
… Girls and women who too brazenly display power, and are unself-conscious or unapologetic about it, disturb people. When famous women get too big for their, admittedly sometimes really small, britches, our culture likes to make sure that what’s inside that often “pretty head” is seen as crazy.
If you think a woman in a tan vinyl bra and underwear, grabbing her crotch and grinding up on a dance partner is raunchy, trashy, and offensive but you don’t think her dance partner is raunchy, trashy, or offensive as he sings a song about “blurred” lines of consent and propagating rape culture, then you may want to reevaluate your acceptance of double standards and your belief in stereotypes about how men vs. women “should” and are “allowed” to behave.
Naturally, the feminazis immediately lash out at the male “participating” in Miley Cyrus’ slutfest. But how much did he really participate? Watch the performance again. That appeared to be a man thinking, “Why did I agree to this?”, not “This is awesome, man!!” He didn’t touch her, not even when she wrapped herself around him. He barely interacted with her. That’s probably because he, like the rest of us, isn’t blind and could see what a hot mess Miley Cyrus was. I’m sure he also was none too pleased over her butchering his song as well. And that’s why Robin Thicke isn’t getting included in the “slut shaming”. He seemed to be making a rather valiant effort to distance himself from the hot mess.
But what about Miley herself?
As much as the feminazis want to turn everything into the evil patriarchy trying to keep the little women down, that isn’t what happened here. What happened was that a 20-year-old girl gave a performance that could best be described as notably unsexy. It was embarrassing, awkward, and sad. People aren’t talking about Miley Cyrus because she was “owning her sexuality”. It wasn’t because she was being too erotic or sensual. It was because the performance was awful. This wasn’t an example of a young woman owning her sexuality. It was a young woman looking incredibly ridiculous in front of millions of people, seemingly without having any clue how dumb she looked.
For comparison’s sake, let’s flash back to the 2000 VMAs. Britney Spears gave what is now one of the most famous performances ever. And that did cause a ton of attention and controversy, because she was genuinely sexy. But she was sexy without looking nearly as trashy or sad or pathetic. Miley couldn’t achieve what Britney did.
Miley Cyrus did not sing or dance well in that performance. She didn’t look all that great, either. Sexy? Not in the least. That’s why just about every celebrity reaction shot during Miley’s performance showed everyone sitting there, stone-faced, probably wondering what the hell they were watching. It was bad.
And yet, because she was trying to look sexy, we’re supposed to applaud it in the name of celebrating women’s sexuality, or something? No one should criticize how awful that performance was? Evidently, the world should keep its collective mouth shut and ignore that Miley Cyrus just made an utter fool out of herself, because if a woman is showing her sexuality — or attempting to, anyway — then no one can say anything bad about it.
The deeper meaning is even worse. We’re now expected to applaud women acting like trashy whores in front of millions because “men do it!”. Rather than empowering women to be better than lowlife males who objectify women in their music, women should sink down to their level and be just as trashy, disgusting, and sick. And this is supposed to be called feminism? Please. It’s not feminist to cheer on a woman for debasing herself as low as she possibly can. It doesn’t help women. Yet the feminazis are urging us to stop with the “slut-shaming” and applaud a woman accepting her sexuality, or whatever. Miley Cyrus looked trashy and sad at the VMAs, and that isn’t something to celebrate. We’re being told that we should no longer have any morals whatsoever, to hold women to no standards, that all behavior — no matter how lewd or crass or disgusting — is acceptable. Thankfully, the outrage over Miley Cyrus’ pathetic performance shows that most of the country, at least, has still not sunk to the low the feminazis are trying to drag us to. Thank God.