President Donald Trump flew into Arnold Palmer Airport in Latrobe Pennsylvania to a rain soaked crowd, while Joe Biden was in Kenosha, Wisconsin. Dueling events are the first sign the 2020 Presidential Race is off and running. Trump was on fire and funny. Biden was …well, odd.

Joe “Hiden” had few supporters outside when he spoke in a church, as Fox News reported:

Former Vice President Joe Biden used an unfortunate choice of words Thursday while visiting Kenosha, Wis. in the aftermath of the police shooting of Jacob Blake.

Biden’s speech aimed at addressing racial unrest veered into talking about inequities in taxes at one point. He stopped himself from laying out his tax policy in detail, saying if he goes on any longer “they’ll shoot me.”

Other than that, the event was flat.

President Trump had something for everyone in Latrobe, the home of Rolling Rock Beer, where he received the endorsement of the Boilermakers Union Local 154. He used the presence of the Boilermakers to make a point about statue removal. D.C. Mayor Muriel Bower had presented a list of statues that need to be moved, removed or contextualized. Trump said the Boilermakers would form a ring around the statues to protect them. You can watch the full event here.

There were far more than the maximum 250 people at the Arnold Palmer Airport hanger and that displeased the Governor of Pennsylvania, as his spokesman noted:

“Masking and social distancing measures, including the limitations on large gatherings, have allowed Pennsylvania to thus far avoid the tragic resurgence of COVID-19 that is occurring in many states that have reopened prematurely,” Ms. Kensinger said. “We hope and expect that the President and those attending rallies will abide by these commonsense restrictions to protect the health and safety of the local community.”

Well, it’s hard to be serious about masking and social distancing after watching the age-vulnerable Nancy Pelosi maskless in a salon, as Trump noted:

After Kious found herself tangling with Nancy Pelosi, who got an illicit blowout at Kious’s E SalonSF in violation of coronavirus restrictions, Trump decided he liked her style. In a tweet Thursday and later at a rally in Pennsylvania, he floated the idea of Kious running for the House of Representatives and taking over as speaker.

“I want the salon owner to lead the House of Representatives,” Trump said at the Latrobe rally.

Miss Kious said she was busy leading her own house with two little girls under ten.

Donald Trump mostly stuck to his law and order and economic riffs, but he did one Biden’s mask and paper straws that was a laugh riot:

Trump is right. The straw people never mention plastic cups and plates, only banning plastic straws. The paper straws to disintegrate. But the riff on Biden’s mask even made the New York Times:

At the rally, Mr. Trump also mocked his Democratic opponent, former Vice President Joseph R. Biden Jr., for wearing a mask, and suggested it was a sign he has a psychological need to feel safe.

“Did you ever see a man who likes to mask as much as him?” Mr. Trump asked the crowd, to laughter, after offering a caveat that people should wash their hands and wear masks in close quarters.

“A lot of times he has it hanging down because it gives him a feeling of security,” Mr. Trump said, bringing his hand to his ear to imitate how Mr. Biden’s mask drapes one side of his face when he takes it off.

“If I was a psychiatrist, I would say this guy has some big issues. I don’t know. Hanging down,” Mr. Trump said.

Although the New York Times is cynical about Trump’s own mask wearing, he did reiterate at the Arnold Palmer Airport the importance of masking, hand-washing and social distancing.

Where the Biden event was subdued and boring, Trump’s event was spirited and hopeful. Much like the United States herself.

Featured Image: Gage Skidmore/Flickr.com/cropped/Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike 2.0 Generic (CC BY-SA 2.0)