Feminist Gives Advice for Interracial Couples, Especially for Whites

Feminist Gives Advice for Interracial Couples, Especially for Whites

Feminist Gives Advice for Interracial Couples, Especially for Whites

As if race relations aren’t complex enough in this country, along comes a feminist and ‘sexuality educator’ who advises white women of “seven things to remember” if they happen to date a “person of color.”

052810_Interracial_marriage

I kid you not.

Melissa Fabello is an expert, you see, because she’s in her third interracial relationship. Why any of these wonderful pairings haven’t turned into anything more permanent is because the woman is a total buzzkill.

As she puts it: “Because when you’re a white person in an interracial relationship, there’s this whole – ohhh, ya know – white supremacy thing hanging in the air.” The first bit of advice she gives the reader is to “be willing to talk about race.” And then, “Being honest about the ways in which race is complex – both inside and outside of your relationship – shows a willingness to engage with a part of your partner’s identity and experience in a way that really holds them.”

Awkwaaaard. . .

And about your family? Oh, be prepared, she advises. People you love are gar-on-teed to make racist comments. “Whether it’s your well-meaning family or your supposed-to-be-socially-conscious friends, sometimes people are going to say or do things that are f**ked up. And it’s your job – both as the partner and a fellow white person – to say something.”

I’ll bet family get-togethers at the holidays are a real joy with this gal (yes, I said “gal”).

Oh, and you, the white suprema-, er, partner in the interracial relationship better be on your toes as well. Fabello says you’re going to say racist things at some time or another: “Because as white people, we’ve been socialized racist, whether we like it or not and whether we believe it’ll play out in our love lives or not – and as such, even a “joke” can be rooted in some really f**ked up, deep seated beliefs.”

Oh, bullcrap.

I know something about relationships between whites and “people of color,” and that’s because my eldest daughter has been married to a young man of Latino background for ten years.

Erika is of primarily German background, and Nick’s parents are immigrants from Nicaragua and Colombia. (Naturalized citizens, too, I would add.) They began dating the summer of their junior year in high school, and the relationship grew legs, lasting through her years at a small Iowa college and his at the U.S. Naval Academy. They married three weeks after their respective graduations.

Ethnicity was never an issue, neither for Nick and Erika, nor for the families. The only time I recall Erika bringing up the issue was when they first started dating.

She and I had gone shopping, and on the drive home, Erika unexpectedly asked, “Mom, do you care that Nick’s Hispanic?”

Without pausing I answered, “No. I only care how he treats you.”

The issue was never brought up again.

Ten years later they have a marriage that would be a model for any young couple. They now have a very handsome and well-loved little boy.

IMG_1702

Here is Erika with her in-laws at the event of our grandson’s Baptism.

IMG_0213

And here is Nick with our family, at the same event.

IMG_0214

(My husband has this thing for Hawaiian shirts, and, yes, he incorrectly “appropriates” the Hawaiian culture. Too bad.)

I cannot imagine having a better son-in-law than Nick. I cannot imagine better in-laws for my daughter than Nick’s parents.

So why don’t the ethnic differences impact their relationship?

It’s simple, really. Both families are proudly American. Both are deeply Christian. Those attributes are uniters, not dividers. And those are things that radical feminists like Melissa Fabello, who constantly sees herself as part of a social group determined by leftist parameters, reject. What a sad life she must lead.

Written by

Kim is a pint-sized patriot who packs some big contradictions. She is a Baby Boomer who never became a hippie, an active Republican who first registered as a Democrat (okay, it was to help a sorority sister's father in his run for sheriff), and a devout Lutheran who practices yoga. Growing up in small-town Indiana, now living in the Kansas City metro, Kim is a conservative Midwestern gal whose heart is also in the Seattle area, where her eldest daughter, son-in-law, and grandson live. Kim is a working speech pathologist who left school system employment behind to subcontract to an agency, and has never looked back. She describes her conservatism as falling in the mold of Russell Kirk's Ten Conservative Principles. Don't know what they are? Google them!

8 Comments
  • Toni Williams says:

    well said.

  • Jodi G. says:

    The height of dumbassery.

  • “[A]s white people, we’ve been socialized racist, whether we like it or not and whether we believe it’ll play out in our love lives or not – and as such, even a “joke” can be rooted in some really f**ked up, deep seated beliefs.”

    Well, that settles it. Obviously my love for my beautiful African wife and our son is nothing but a tawdry cover for White Privilege. Or something like that. Whatever.

    I guess I better confess and tell my African wife that I am a card-carrying dyed-in-the-wool member of the KKK. For some strange reason I don’t remember ever joining up – let alone endorsed the KKK’s wackadoodle worldview – but who am I to dispute the deep and profound wisdom of a sage like Ms. Mabello?

    Does anyone at Victory Girls know how I can get in touch with Grand Wizard Eric Holder so I can turn myself in for the punishment I richly deserve?

  • GWB says:

    And here is Nick with our family, at the same event.

    And, obviously you’re a racist, Kim. After all, Nick is on the *outside* of your little grouping. Naturally you didn’t *know* you did this – because you’re racist. /s

    Yes, I have been around this crap waaaaaaaay too long.

    And, yes, I must be a racist, myself. I married a colored black African-American woman “woman of color”, so it must be a deep-seated desire to control the Other or something.

    On the other hand, I did have stupid comments from a few family members (including my grandmother). But, we moved on. (And my grandmother got on famously with her grandmother at the wedding.)

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Subscribe
Become a Victory Girl!

Are you interested in writing for Victory Girls? If you’d like to blog about politics and current events from a conservative POV, send us a writing sample here.
Ava Gardner
gisonboat
rovin_readhead
Instagram
Instagram did not return a 200.