This morning I read that a teacher punished a 10 year old 5th grader in North Carolina because he called her ma’am. Evidently the teacher had insisted to the class that manners weren’t necessary. 

Student Tamarion Wilson, 10, was made to write out the word ‘ma’am’ repeatedly during class on Tuesday at North East Carolina Preparatory School in Tarboro, North Carolina.

His mother Teretha Wilson was shocked when he returned home from the public charter school with the sheet of paper, for her to sign in order to complete the punishment.

I beg your pardon?? At first when I saw the headlines I thought I was reading The Onion. But no, this genuinely happened.

I can completely understand the shock and WTH? reaction from Tamarion’s parents. Understandably they went to the school principal and asked for clarification.

First of all, for a teacher to insist that her students not be polite to her? That’s the start of letting kids get away with all sorts of rudeness, which as any parent knows, can escalate into worse behaviors. But to also say she was going to throw something at him and then insist to the parents and the principal that she was JOKING? Wow.

Understandably, Tamarion’s parents were not amused by what the teacher did and said. The following is from Teretha’s Facebook post on the matter.

Facebook what is the definition of ma’am? My child was punished for addressing his teacher as ma’am. Mrs.Williams 5th grade teacher of North East Carolina Preparatory School made my child do write offs MA’AM and told him if she had some to throw she would because he kept calling her ma’am
We had a meeting today with her and the principal for her to say she will not answer him if she continue to call her ma’am and that she did say she would throw something at him. I can’t say what won’t said and have never seen anything like this before. With everything going on in the world when did it become a issue for a child to respect their elders.

#INeedAnswers
#ThisIsHisMother

She asks a very important question. When DID it become ok for children to be disrespectful? I’m sure there will be multitudes of people providing all sorts of answers as to the root causes of disrespect. However, the important thing here is two-fold.

A TEACHER didn’t want her students to be respectful.

A student’s PARENTS expect him to be respectful at all times.

Tamarion was doing as his parents taught him. I applaud them. I was raised much the same way and have worked to raise my daughter, now in college, that way as well.

This morning I observed how two families are raising their children. One family let all three kids (from about 5-12 yrs old) run wild, talk rudely to their parents and the servers. Another family with two kids was quite the contrast. Both children were admonished when they didn’t say ‘no sir,’ and ‘yes please’ when interacting with the server.

Given that observation, to find that a teacher didn’t care about manners is quite troubling. I found the response by Tamarion’s parents to be quite measured and in fact, very respectful given the situation.

Good response…..After Wilson signed the paper, she had Tamarion write down the definition of “ma’am” (“a term of respectful or polite address used for a woman,” according to Oxford Dictionaries) and hand that in as well. https://t.co/LqKLsrzWBK

— Leslie (@Lesliejean1964) August 25, 2018

Yes, I’d say that response made quite an impact. Tamarion’s parents are going to take this matter to the school board tomorrow. Given the type of environment the school promotes… 

North East Carolina Prep School creates an educational environment where students are inspired to academic discovery and excellence through an emphasis on experiential learning.  The approach is designed to honor individuality and diversity, nurture respect for self, others, and the environment, and to foster a lifelong love of learning.  Small classes, strong parental support, and innovative teaching methods are hallmarks of our school. [Emphasis Added]

I know quite a number of teachers and I’d be willing to bet that, if asked, they’d be absolutely thrilled to have students in their class with such good manners as Tamarion has.

Here is a young man adhering to his parents’ teachings AND following the school guidelines concerning respect for others. He should’ve been applauded by that teacher, not punished.