Just in Time for Christmas Gifting: A Phallic Cross

Just in Time for Christmas Gifting: A Phallic Cross

Proving that being an elite member of the haute couture crowd doesn’t necessarily translate into possessing good taste, designer Tom Ford has produced what he has labeled a “penis pendant necklace” just in time for, er, stuffing into some lucky stiff’s (pun intended) stocking.

And yes, it takes on a form that is held in reverence by millions across the globe: a cross.

TFPND005D-GDC_GPB_OS_AThe, ahem, big one can be yours for a mere $790, also proving that just because one is flush with money doesn’t mean that person has good taste either. But in case your budget is a little less endowed, it is also available in small and medium.

The folks at Bustle, in a post which demonstrates their sophomoric proclivities, call it “. . .a steal when you factor in all the priceless reactions you’ll receive from conservative family members. . .” The feminists at Jezebel called it a “Crucifix-D**k,” demonstrating their ignorance about basic Christian symbols.

The Kansas City Star’s Lucy Gutierrez provided a less gleeful, more common sense Midwest point of view when she labeled it the “weirdest stocking stuffer of 2014,” concluding that she’ll “stick with fruitcake.” So will I, and I don’t even like fruitcake.

Somehow I don’t think this will be available at the Vatican Gift website, much less receive the approval of Pope Francis. And I don’t think either of my pastors will be receiving it, either.

I’m waiting breathlessly for the moment that Tom Ford designs a phallic Mohammed.

Written by

Kim is a pint-sized patriot who packs some big contradictions. She is a Baby Boomer who never became a hippie, an active Republican who first registered as a Democrat (okay, it was to help a sorority sister's father in his run for sheriff), and a devout Lutheran who practices yoga. Growing up in small-town Indiana, now living in the Kansas City metro, Kim is a conservative Midwestern gal whose heart is also in the Seattle area, where her eldest daughter, son-in-law, and grandson live. Kim is a working speech pathologist who left school system employment behind to subcontract to an agency, and has never looked back. She describes her conservatism as falling in the mold of Russell Kirk's Ten Conservative Principles. Don't know what they are? Google them!

5 Comments
  • Rebecca says:

    “Fashion is a form of ugliness so intolerable that we have to alter it every six months.” – Oscar Wilde

  • Appalled By The World says:

    How about a phallic crescent? Oh wait-that would offend the Left’s allies-with very fatal results.

    The Left-always striving to bring taste to all time lows.

  • GWB says:

    The, ahem, big one can be yours for a mere $790

    But I thought size didn’t matter. That’s what all the girls tell my friends.

    concluding that she’ll “stick with fruitcake.”

    Well, I’m sure some guys will give this to their boyfriends, so there is fruitcake involved………

  • Yvonne Starks says:

    If Tom Ford is smart, he’ll begin marketing his ‘creativity’ to the RAPE CLUB WOMEN who are major in the news today….all the Bill Cosby ‘victims’, Lena Dunham, and “Jackie”…all seeming to be proud to capitalize on their (made up?) dramatic rape stories….even providing some ‘visual effects’ to go with them?

    Would at least have some similarities to those celebrities who have themselves proudly photographed in their “I had an abortion” t-shirts…Ford’s item is a much ‘classier’ way of announcing the latest in how women are ‘used’ and ‘hated’ in eeeevil America….

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