President Trump met Queen Elizabeth for the very first time on Friday on the steps of the Quadrangle at Windsor Palace. There an Honor Guard gave a royal salute to the Queen and played our National Anthem. It was all quite splendid, because no one does pageantry like the Brits.
To be sure, some in the British tabloids sniped at a small breach of protocol Trump committed when at one point he stepped ahead of the Queen while inspecting the Guards. But also consider that Queen Elizabeth is 92 and Trump is much younger, and taller. He quickly corrected his faux pas.
Even the BBC cut him some slack.
Meanwhile, away from the Palace, some other Brits — angry at Trump for who knows what? — protested in the streets.
Many of them were. . . well, interesting.
Like this guy dressed like a cross between Trump and a gorilla, behind bars:
And this drag queen. Because nothing says your cause is credible like a drag queen.
Then there’s this woman with a medieval mindset who wants dogs to kill and consume President Trump, apparently.
Um, honey? Three generations of my family have owned corgis. Believe me, they’re happy clowns, and thinking they’d ever kill and devour a human is laughable.
And speaking of laughable, remember that ginormous baby Trump balloon that was going to float over London? Dominating the skies like the Goodyear blimp?
It was supposed to be like this:
The reality was, let’s say, underwhelming. I’ve seen more impressive balloons while watching the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day parade on TV.
Lift off: #Trumpbaby balloon lifts off in London as crowds gather to protest the U.S. president's visit to Britain https://t.co/D9OBerUmha #TrumpVisitUK pic.twitter.com/0NWPpifBei
— Reuters Top News (@Reuters) July 13, 2018
So why are all you silly Brits protesting? Please, show us on the big floating baby where the mean President hurt you.
Or maybe you could just express yourselves by banging on pots and pans, like these women:
Lisa Gee: “Pots and pans are symbolic of women’s power”. Her message to Trump: “Don’t disrespect Londoners and say our mayor is doing a terrible job because Londoners will come out in force.” #TrumpProtests pic.twitter.com/nTL112FVpc
— Alexandra Topping (@LexyTopping) July 13, 2018
“Don’t say our mayor is doing a terrible job. . .” oh, you mean the mayor who thinks that banning knives will stop the uptick in homicides in London? That guy?
But go ahead, ladies, and bang on your pots. You know, the last person I saw pounding on a pot was my grandson when he was a toddler, but you be you.
And speaking of pounding on things, check out this fellow beating up a Trump punching bag. Because he’s a tough guy who hates Trump, or something.
Trump must be literally shaking pic.twitter.com/7rJG7UUf3a
— Orwell & Goode (@OrwellNGoode) July 13, 2018
Naturally, the LGBTQRSTUV crowd also showed up, because it’s what they do. They’re especially outraged because Trump allegedly banned trans-people from serving in the military. Here’s what a spokes, um, person said:
“One of the first things Trump did was ban trans people in the military. We are often the canary in the coal mine so we are here to say not in our name. We are here, we are queer and we are not going away.”
Now why should that person care? It’s our military, not theirs. Besides, as of January 1, transgender people can enlist in the military, so their overwrought point is moot, isn’t it.
But they’re here, and queer, and they’re not going away.
Meanwhile, the President and First Lady will be in Scotland on Saturday. And guess what will follow them there?
You guessed it: the Trump Baby Balloon will be headed to Scotland, where the creator hopes to fly it near Trump’s golf course in Turnberry.
Sigh. Children gonna tantrum, I guess.
What was the point of beating back the Nazi menace just to give the country away?
Keep calm and…get knifey with it in beautiful Londonistan.
I’ve seen more impressive balloons while watching the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day parade on TV.
Well, duh, ’cause those are ‘Merican, baby! Heck, I’ve seen more impressive balloons used to clear arterial obstructions and urethrae.
I can’t wait to see the Khan one they were putting together.
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