This straight from The New York Post. In light of the harsh inequality us women face in this country, (sarcasm), more mothers want to throw their girls a period party when they hit the milestone of menstruation.

This trend is not necessarily a new one but period parties have seen an uptick:

The survey, commissioned by INTIMINA and conducted by OnePoll, revealed the experience of learning about menstruation for today’s adult women was a fraught and emotional one.

The average woman was shamed about her period three times in her youth, so it’s no wonder three in five (62 percent) women associate embarrassment and shame with their first period.

Three in 10 admitted they were “scared” when they first learned about menstruation while a quarter were “shocked” and 32 percent were “confused.”

–The New York Post

Two-thirds of mothers surveyed by INTIMINA were in favor of these so-called period parties to promote body positivity and a sense of empowerment in their daughters.

Flashback to 1983. This may be a bit too much information but I will share anyway. I was a 12 year-old girl and teased my mother because she packed a duffel bag of Stayfree maxi pads as her carry-on before we boarded an airplane for a family vacation to Acapulco. I called it the “precious cargo” and laughed at her misery. It was that very day on the middle of the flight that I came out of the airplane lav wailing that I needed the bag. My aunt and uncle were also on the trip and it became the humorous family story for months after it happened. I mean, they told EVERYBODY! I never lived that one down. Did I feel shame? Not really. Was it my mother’s intent to bring shame upon me? Of course not.

Back then, us girls read a popular Judy Blume book. Ladies my age will know and be able to recite the “I must, I must” chant from Are You There God? It’s Me, Margaret. I was mortified that I made fun of my mom and had to ask for the “precious cargo” in tears as I bolted out of the airplane lav. More than anything, I was pissed because this period thing was going to impact my pool time and I loved to swim. I was also relieved because I was normal. But I didn’t want to have a party to celebrate my normalcy. I wanted to get through it.

In our society, being a modern feminist is defined by one thing and one thing alone: having a vagina. Feminists want to be known for their grit, their smarts, their brains but extreme feminists are reduced to this. Movements like free bleeding have taken things to a whole new level. All of a sudden, a big “eff you” to the patriarchy trumps logic and basic hygiene. Why? Period shaming, they say.

What would happen, for instance, if suddenly, magically, men could menstruate and women could not? The answer is clear—menstruation would become an enviable, boast-worthy, masculine event: Men would brag about how long and how much.”-Gloria Steinem

But, Gloria, didn’t you know? Men can have periods! I digress. This period party thing, though? My vote is a no. Why? While menstruation can be seen as a coming of age rite of passage for young women, it is private. It should be private. There is no need for the world to know that a young woman is bleeding out of her uterus. Really. While I agree no woman, no matter the age, should not be shamed for the monthly visitor, I don’t think its cause for an Instagram announcement and hashtags, either. For crying out loud, Pinterest even has party ideas!

Seriously, girls are under so much scrutiny on social media as it is. Girls are mean. Why put something so private on display and make one’s daughter even more vulnerable to this scrutiny? Some things should just be private. It is okay to have privacy and these girls-and moms in some cases-need to learn this. No “first moon”, no “red tent” needed. No duck faces and tongues wagging for once. Keep it simple. A mani, pedi, lunch and a talk. Yes DIALOGUE. Moms, talk to your daughters and encourage them that this change comes with no shame but also comes with responsibility. Want to encourage activism? Research making period kits for women in third-world countries. No need to invite the neighborhood. We all know “Flo” will show up no matter what.