Heartbreaker: Jacques Chirac mauled by poodle

Heartbreaker: Jacques Chirac mauled by poodle

And no, it’s not a joke. The former French President has been mauled by his poodle.

Former French President Jacques Chirac was rushed to a hospital after being mauled by his pet dog who is being treated for depression, in a dramatic incident that rattled the ex-president’s wife.

The couple’s white Maltese poodle, called Sumo, has a history of frenzied fits and became increasingly prone to making “vicious, unprovoked attacks” despite receiving treatment with anti-depressants, Chirac’s wife Bernadette said.

“If you only knew! I had a dramatic day yesterday,” she told VSD magazine. “Sumo bit my husband!”

Mrs. Chirac, 74, did not reveal where the former president was bitten, but said, “the dog went for him for no apparent reason.”

Somehow, it doesn’t surprise me that a poodle was able to maul a former President of France.

Hat Tip: Right Wing News

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  • Scott Jacobs says:

    Sweet Jesus that’s funny…

  • Knott Buyinit says:

    Proof that God not only exists, he has a sense of humor (as if we didn’t know that after he created golf!)!

  • Big Al says:

    Poodles are aggressive… and who wouldn’t want to take a bite out of Chirac’s arse…

    Seriously, if they were already experiancing aggressive behavior out of the animal despite treatment, as bad as it sounds, they probably should have had the dog put down or removed to a controlled enviroment. We all love our animals (I’ve got three “kid’s” at present)but we run a terrible risk to ourselves and others if we don’t properly address the issue when they become aggressive.

    Poodles: Years ago my family was visiting at the home of a old family friend (a widowed lady Judge). After sitting in her den for at least two hours watching television and talking my father crossed his legs – swapping one side to the other – and when he did our friends (French) poodle jumped up, raced across the room and bite my father rather badly on the ankle. He never barked, never growled, just ion the blink of an eye attacked. Afterward he was very aggressive and hard for his owner to restrain and had to be shut up in a bedroom. We had been around this dog several times before and it had never shown the first hint of aggression. Vet told me that it was the inborn hunting instinct and that poodles really aren’t all that great to have around kids as they can be nervous/aggressive and snap(bite) when they feel threatened.

  • I shouldn’t laugh at this, but alas, I did. Hard.

  • NB says:

    Somehow it doesn’t surprise me that in France, poodles are the tough dogs. God forbid you’d let a German Shepherd or a Rottweiler loose. The whole country would probably surrender to it. AAAAAHAHAHAHAHA.

  • SicSemperTyrannus says:

    Submitted for moderation, a joke of questionable taste.

    Q: What’s the difference between a pit bull humping your leg and a toy poodle humping your leg?

    A: You let the pit bull finish!

  • I R A Darth Aggie says:

    In the Name of Obama, the Most Merciful, the Most Compassionate, I
    present greetings and blessing upon you.

    (how do you like my new greeting?)

    Y’all are basing your poodle jokes on the toy (6-10 pounds), and miniature (15-17 pounds) poodle varieties. I supsect that Chirac’s version is the much larger standard (45-70 pounds).

    Of course anyone not on the receiving end of small dog’s ire thinks it is funny.

  • The Watcher says:

    I wonder if the dog was barking Allahua akhbar or threatened to burn a car before he bit Chirac?

  • J David says:

    What a pity! And he no longer has his buddy, Saddam Hussein, upon whose shoulder he might cry. Tsk, tsk!

  • MrSpkr says:

    Oh dear lord. The DOG was being treated for depression?

    Dog psychiatry? Really?

    The western world is truly in decline when the president of a self-important Western nation would actually buy into something as absurd as dog psychiatry.

    Somewhere, Sam Kinison is laughing his decaying arse off.

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