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As all of you are aware by now, Senator Dianne Feinstein died last Friday morning. May her memory be a blessing. We come here today to discuss her most valuable asset, her Senate seat. We come here to discuss an aspirant to that seat, Meghan Markle, former cable tv actress, currently Princess Henry, Duchess of Sussex, Countess of Dumbarton, Baroness of Kilkeel, and a grifter of renown.
I have a confession to make. I am a ginormous consumer of gossip regarding royalty. Mostly, the British Royal Family, but in a pinch, any biped with a title will suffice. Thus, I was happy when Prince Harry found someone who would marry him. Since Miss Markle was not an ingenue, but a mid-thirties divorcee, I thought the stark white wedding gown with trailing veil and train, in Windsor Castle’s St. George Chapel with (now) King Charles III walking her halfway down the aisle was over the top squared. By that age and status, you can walk yourself. But, Her Late Majesty Queen Elizabeth II approved it, so I didn’t turn my blue nose up too much. Until I saw that horrific dress. I agreed with Katy Perry, just one more fitting.
Gossip b*tches tend to hear things. Teacup and saucer thrown at staff, complaint about a lack of pay. Not being able to accept free stuff, which is standard practice in L.A. and a big no-no for British Royalty. Oprah didn’t think that the five bedroom Frogmore Cottage in Windsor Park was nice enough. Guests shouldn’t sneer their noses at free, grace and favor houses. Meghan didn’t understand why her star power didn’t leapfrog Harry and her over William and Catherine. Meghan should have studied primogeniture.
The Duchess was not happy. She grabbed the Duke and decamped, eventually, to her home state of California. She snagged a $20 million Spotify deal, an even more lucrative Netflix deal and an Oprah interview where she accused the Royal Family of racism. The interview was conducted at the Sussexes $14 million Montecito estate that looks right out of an Olive Garden commercial. The Oprah interview was a lie-filled horror, the Archetypes Spotify podcasts were not stellar and the Netflix reality show was most notable for Meghan’s curtsy to the queen. Watch this:
Yes, she mocked Harry’s dying grandmother, but she also mocked Americans with her Medieval Times comment. I haven’t been there, but I have been to Dolly Parton’s Dixie Stampede a lot. No respect for anyone outside of herself. The Spotify podcasts were pre-taped without her, were banal and when Spotify canceled the contract, an executive, Bill Simmons said:
“I wish I had been involved in the ‘Meghan and Harry leave Spotify’ negotiation. ‘The Fucking Grifters.’ That’s the podcast we should have launched with them,” Simmons said on his podcast, the Bill Simmons podcast. “I have got to get drunk one night and tell the story of the Zoom I had with Harry to try and help him with a podcast idea. It’s one of my best stories … Fuck them. The grifters.”
If you need a better idea of how tedious the Sussexes are, I encourage you to watch the South Park episode. It is ice cold.
If Meghan cannot be successful as an entrepreneur or royal, she’ll try politics. Early on, Meghan cold-called Senators to advise them on how to vote:
An American senator has mocked Meghan Markle saying she’s “more interested” in what her constituents have to say after the Duchess of Sussex cold-called her.
The former senior royal took it upon herself to lobby Republican politicians as she pushed them to include paid parental leave and a climate policy by the US Government.
Calling senators Shelley Moore Capito and Susan Collins on a withheld number, when they answered the phone they were told: “This is Meghan, the Duchess of Sussex.”
The 40-year-old’s intervention has reignited calls for her to be stripped of her royal title after again breaching Buckingham Palace protocol by involving herself in politics.
Just so you know, Meghan’s target on Senator Feinstein’s Senate seat began about a year ago:
It’s no secret that Meghan Markle and Prince Harry have been outspoken on a variety of social issues: Paid family leave, environmental protection, and equitable vaccine access, to name just a few that have come up in the last month. And while it would make sense that highlighting these issues, which the Sussexes have said they take very personally, is just part of how they want to use their famous names for good, they may also be helping Meghan gear up for an even bigger role: Running for U.S. Congress.
According to Richard Johnson, a professor at Queen Mary University who spoke to Express UK, there’s even a particular congressional seat Meghan might be keeping in mind: The Senate seat that may soon be vacated by Dianne Feinstein, a California Democrat who, at 88 years old, is rumored to be considering retirement, and will likely not seek reelection. “If she wanted to follow this track of high profile celebrities leapfrogging to the top office, that senate seat would be a very attractive one for her,” Johnson said of Markle. “There is some record of celebrity politicians doing pretty well in the U.S.,” he added, referencing both Ronald Reagan (a former actor turned California governor turned U.S. President) and Arnold Schwarzenegger (another actor-turned-California governor).
Now, Governor “Hair-Gel” Newsom has proclaimed that he will nominate a Black woman for the seat. Meghan is occasionally Black which qualifies her, I suppose. Newsom only wants a place holder. Someone to take the seat until the 2024 election. Meghan has a lot to gain from being a temporary Senator. Look how well Joe Biden has done over the years. Former Speaker Pelosi is the poster child for being a grifter in elected office. The Sussexes need the money there is a mortgage on Olive Garden, full-time security costs a lot and getting charities to buy Meghan’s wardrobe is getting push back.
You can count on one finger the number of Senator-Duchesses there are in the world. Meghan could keep the grift going for a few more years. Assuming, that is that she doesn’t want to keep the seat. She doesn’t like doing “the work” and that will grow old fast.
It’s legitimately laughable that Meghan Markle in all her narcissistic sociopathy, would consider herself anywhere near experienced enough to be considered for Diane Feinsteins senate seat! You have to actually lead something other than a PR campaign to be in the same…
— Mystifeyed (@Mystifeye) September 29, 2023
Featured Image: Gerard Stolk/flickr.com/cropped/Creative Commons
NTSOG says: In every photo I have seen she looks smug like the cat that got the cream. As for “Meghan, the Duchess of Sussex” she is entitled in the worst sense of the term.
Scott says: I think Mystified is wrong, it wouldn’t surprise me at all of Newscum puts her in the seat, and just look at AOC, no actual work is required, if your constituents are dumb enough.. and they did keep reelected Feinstein’s corpse, soo….
Jeff Stidham says: <>
Well, Meghan is a democrat, after all. Walking on corpses is what they do.
The only novelty here is that she wants to walk on the body of an old woman, not a pile of dead children.
Laura T says: Gavin Newsome would be humiliated out of politics if he put a known lying grifter in that seat. She’s known for is being a difficult, abusive, bully who nobody wants to work with.
GWB says: Gavin Newsome would be humiliated out of politics if he put a known lying grifter in that seat.
What? How would that appointment be any different from any of the elected Senators from California in the last 20 years? Vast numbers of Senators are bullies that no one (except the other grifting, lying bullies) wants to really work with.
Appointing Markle wouldn’t humiliate him any more than appointing someone who isn’t a Californian, or going to eat at French Trough or whatever during the Covidiocy.
Bucky says: Sorry Megan, Gov Brylcreem picked a much darker skinned woman instead of you.
GWB says: Who isn’t even a resident of California. Oof.
(Admittedly, that’s less oof than picking someone who shouldn’t even be an American citizen.)
SFC D says: Megan doesn’t check enough diversity boxes to get a seat anywhere in California politics. She’s not even qualified to get a seat at the adult table on thanksgiving.
GWB says: Meghan should have studied primogeniture.
She should have studied a lot of things.
decamped, eventually, to her home state of California
Except she should have been required to give up her American citizenship to become royalty. Period. “Sorry, honey, but we don’t do queens of that sort here. Here’s your British passport. Don’t let the door hit ya.”
And this is more than the “no titles of nobility” bit in the Constitution. This is more that royalty, BY DEFINITION, has allegiance to someone other than the US Constitution and the country it created. They are beholden to their superior nobility AND to the crown who is over them all.
“This is Meghan, the Duchess of Sussex.”
Oh? And why is British nobility calling me to influence my vote? Or is this call from a pay phone in a mental institution? Is Napoleon standing behind you? Because I’d rather talk to him. You also might want to think about registering as a foreign agent, ‘Duchess’. Now bugger off, ya lairy bint and let me get back to America’s work.
And if she didn’t hang up after that…
Where do they teach you to talk like this? In some Panama City “Sailor wanna hump-hump” bar, or is it getaway day and your last shot at the Brit’s whiskey? Sell crazy someplace else, we’re all stocked up here.
which the Sussexes have said they take very personally
Well, isn’t that nice. From your mansion in the hills. We don’t really care what you two think.
how they want to use their famous names for good
Go shill for the March of Dimes. Or start a foundation for gingers who have no stones. It would be a small group you’re helping, but you have to start somewhere, with something with which you’re actually familiar.
full-time security costs a lot
You know, you could just do the American thing and take responsibility for your own safety. Buy a gun, get a permit, and carry.
You can count on one finger the number of Senator-Duchesses there are in the world.
Only if you ball that hand up into a fist and tuck the thumb down, too. There are none.
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