Happy New Year, readers and friends! We made it through to the other side, but what awaits us in 2024?

Well, after talking with my fellow blogging sisters, we have some opinions about what might happen in this coming year. If our prognostications are any indication, 2024 is going to be as wild and woolly as the previous years have been. I’m going to break this post into two lists – our political predictions, and our non-political predictions (and I will tell you who made the call, so you know whom to credit/blame later). Here we go….

Political Predictions For 2024

1) Joe Biden will drop out of the presidential race.
This prediction was made by our Editor-in-Chief Kate and our meme queen Jodi. It’s not a stretch to make this prediction, especially when you consider the panic that is clearly present for Democrats every time Old Man Joe goes up a flight of stairs, or opens his mouth without cue cards or a teleprompter. And sometimes, Biden loses against the teleprompter.

But who would take over for Joe if he falls down for the last time? The predictions were split among your Victory Girls. EIC Kate and Jodi firmly believe that Governor Hair Gel himself, Gavin Newsom of California, will step right on Kamala Harris on his way to the Democrat nomination, despite his pathetic showing against Ron DeSantis during their Red State/Blue State debate. However, Toni, Carol, and Kim predict that Michelle Obama might be drafted by the Democrats to be the nominee – which would be a bold move by the Democrats, and be very difficult for Republicans to counter. Amanda went big and predicted that Hillary Clinton would try to swoop in to save the day if Biden goes down. To which I think we all say, YIKES.

My prediction? Joe Biden does drop out of the race, but because he is forced to for health reasons, and it will be too late to replace him on the ballot, which means Democrats are stuck with Kamala Harris. Poor Gavin Newsom, knight in well-gelled armor on his white horse (what a racist), will just have to go back to the barn.

2) There will be a terror attack within the United States.
This prediction comes from Kim, who thinks that it will either target civilians or a military facility, and sadly, given the state of the southern border, I do think she’s correct. Consider the number of people who have been CAUGHT at the southern border who are on the terror watch list. And then think about how many weren’t caught.

From Oct. 1, 2022, to Aug. 31, 2023, Customs and Border Protection reported encountering 151 illegal aliens on the terrorist watchlist between ports of entry on the southern border, plus 76 more at ports of entry. This number does not include an unknown number of “gotaways” who successfully evaded Border Patrol agents and entered the interior of the U.S.

And the northern border isn’t doing much better, as we learned this week that an Iranian national tried to enter the United States from Canada just this last October.

Immigration and Customs Enforcement (ICE) said in a release this week that it has removed the Iranian, who is also a permanent resident of Canada, a national security priority and wanted for assault, back to Canada.

The unnamed man had tried to enter legally in October at the port of entry in Niagara Falls, but was refused entry by Customs and Border Protection (CBP) and turned back to Canadian border officials.

He was then arrested two days later trying to enter illegally between the ports of entry near the Whirlpool Bridge port of entry.

He was served with an expedited order of removal in November and was removed to Canada earlier this month based on a Safe Third Country agreement between the two countries.

While ICE would like to pat themselves on the back, the rest of us are very aware that all it takes is ONE bad guy getting across the border without being caught. The massive invasion that is happening on Biden’s watch will have disastrous consequences – and perhaps deadly ones on a large scale.

3) China will make a move on Taiwan.
This prediction comes from our resident artist and storyteller Darleen. Given that Xi Jinping, China’s not-so-loveable Pooh Bear, allegedly told Joe Biden during their summit in San Francisco that he wants Taiwan to surrender peacefully to him, just to make it less messy, I would say that the clock is ticking on how much longer the status quo will last.

Xi told Biden in a group meeting attended by a dozen American and Chinese officials that China’s preference is to take Taiwan peacefully, not by force, the officials said.

The Chinese leader also referenced public predictions by U.S. military leaders who say that Xi plans to take Taiwan in 2025 or 2027, telling Biden that they were wrong because he has not set a time frame, according to the two current and one former official briefed on the meeting.

Chinese officials also asked in advance of the summit that Biden make a public statement after the meeting saying that the U.S. supports China’s goal of peaceful unification with Taiwan and does not support Taiwanese independence, they said. The White House rejected the Chinese request.

Given that Taiwan has made their opinions on being forcibly “reunified” with China pretty clear, Xi’s dreams of being welcomed like a beloved daddy (so squishy! so fluffy!) are going to be shot down, literally. The question then becomes what Biden will do, and if it will take him too long to do anything.

4) Texas vs. the Feds will be a political battle for the ages.
Courtesy of Amanda, the battle over the southern border is quickly going to move into court. In one corner is the Biden administration, who says “no, you can’t come in” while holding the proverbial door open. In the other corner is the state of Texas, who has already tried to plug the holes in the border by blocking off the Rio Grande River with buoys, and stringing razor wire along the border itself. This is an ongoing struggle between the state trying to stave off an invasion, and the federal government who simply doesn’t care. So Governor Abbott of Texas and Governor DeSantis of Florida started sending these illegals north, and the freakouts began. Chicago Mayor Brandon Johnson, who still holds that Chicago is a “sanctuary city,” is now complaining about the numbers that Abbott has sent to them. Apparently, it’s okay if TEXAS has to provide for these illegal migrants, but not deep blue Chicago.

A plane carrying more migrants from Texas arrived in the Chicago area overnight, which @ChicagosMayor Brandon Johnson calls "a very dangerous task" by Texas Gov. Greg Abbott and a matter of national security.

"Governor Abbott is determined to continue to sow seeds of chaos." pic.twitter.com/tTvkWe9N0s

— Face The Nation (@FaceTheNation) December 31, 2023

And now the federal government is telling Texas that they will sue if Texas enforces immigration law. And Democrats have drawn a target on Texas, hoping to turn the state purple at a minimum.

My prediction: Texas will win in court – but the state GOP will struggle to maintain their majority.

5) Joe Biden will cave and pardon Hunter.
This prediction belongs to me. Despite all protests to the contrary, if Hunter is convicted on those felony tax charges in California, or if FARA charges materialize, Joe will pardon Hunter before he calls it quits. There is no way that “the Big Guy” lets his precious widdle man-baby spend a single day behind bars if he can stop it with a pen. Plus, it will conveniently save Joe’s ass to pardon Hunter before the investigation digs up anything connected to him.

And now, so we don’t begin 2024 on a totally depressing note, I asked for some non-political predictions. My fellow writers delivered. Here’s what they said, in no particular order…

Non-Political Predictions For 2024

EIC Kate: “Taylor Swift’s biggest hit of all time will be her Kelce breakup song. And the Chiefs (and me) will rejoice.” Right off the bat, we’re taking on the Swifties.

Kim: “Chiefs will not go to the Super Bowl and the Royals will suck. Again.” This has to hurt, as these are Kim’s favorite teams, and she has had to put up with a LOT of Taylor Swift lately.

Carol: “Dylan Mulvaney will go back to being a dude for more attention.” Ohhhh wow. Imagine that, after all that Dylan has put us through this year.

Darleen: “Break up of Disney ala splitting off (or selling) the amusement parks from movie studios.” That might help to save one part of the company, but Disney may be too far gone to save.

Nina: “John Kerry will dine on bugs and realize they should never be a menu item.” I still don’t think that will stop him from insisting that the peasants should eat them anyway.

Carol: “Elon will sell X to Zuckerberg.” Talk about going bold or going home.

My non-political predictions: Taylor Swift and Travis Kelce will be engaged by the end of 2024. Will she continue to be the Yoko Ono of the Kansas City Chiefs?

And the Los Angeles Dodgers will not make it to the World Series, despite their acquisitions of Shohei Ohtani and Yoshinobu Yamamoto. I’m not bitter, why do you ask?

Do you have a political, or a non-political prediction? Put it in the comments and we’ll check it in a year, and see if anyone comes up with bragging rights for calling it for 2024. Happy New Year, everyone!

Featured image: Ondrejk via Wikimedia Commons, cropped, public domain