Like many, I’m hitting the law of diminishing returns on the near-endless wave of sexual harassment claims. It’s getting so bad, that men are declining to work with women, mentor them in the workplace, or hold meetings, or even open doors for women, for fear of being accused of sexual harassment! Predictably, this will lead to feminist screeching about how they’re excluded in the workplace and from promotion opportunities, but that’s another topic for another day.

As much as I think Al Franken is a neanderthal perv, squeezing someone’s waist during a photo doesn’t strike me as sexual harassment. Being overly familiar with someone is maybe inappropriate at certain venues, but sexual harassment? Come on! I will emulate a wise Supreme Court justice in Jacobellis v. Ohio about a film deemed by the lower courts to be pornography, I’m not going to try to define sexual harassment in detail, “but I know it when I see it.”

That said…

What in the everloving, turtle-humping hell, Marcy Kaptur?

A female Democratic House member shocked fellow lawmakers Wednesday when she said that the revealing clothing that some members and staffers wear is an “invitation” to sexual harassment.

[…]

“I saw a member yesterday with her cleavage so deep it was down to the floor,” Kaptur said, according to the sources present. “And what I’ve seen … it’s really an invitation.” The comments left many others in the room stunned, the sources said.

File this under #thingstheTalibanwould say, will ya?

Those of you castigating Kaptur for this particular bit of stupid ought to remember that frothing fundamentalist fruitcake Matt Walsh said something very similar recently. He promoted the idea of men following the “Pence rule,” of never being alone with a woman other than his wife, chastity, and modesty.

Otherwise, derps Walsh, women shouldn’t be surprised if harassment occurs, because they didn’t take steps to decrease the likelihood of falling victim to harassment.

DAFUQ?

And then, there’s this barely literate crotch monkey.

Let’s get something clear here, Derpy McFuckles: the way a woman dresses in no way gives you or any other cave creature the right to grab her, or stick any of your filthy body parts into any orifice she may possess. It’s a simple matter of property rights. Our bodies are our property, and if you invade said property with any extremity, you risk getting it shot off, sliced off, or pulled off, much like you would if you entered my house uninvited, bitch!

Second, sexual assault and harassment aren’t about clothes. They’re about power, plain and simple. Harvey Weinstein used sex to wield power over others, and if you haven’t read Salma Hayek’s story, you should. It’s a typical tale of an entitled neanderthal wielding his power over those he perceived as weaker. Al Franken’s “It’s my right [to grope and assault you] as an entertainer” further underscores the entitled “I’m better and more powerful than you, because I’m famous” mentality exhibited by these needle-dicked fuckcakes. This is not about clothing! Franken groped a U.S. Soldier, while she was wearing a simple white shirt! I get the feeling Matt Lauer would have stuck his tiny little prick into Cousin It, as long as he knew where to locate the hole!

The human body is beautiful. Wearing clothes that emphasize one’s assets is not an invitation to touch, grope, squeeze, or hump. Not being alone with a woman may be a smart strategy for Mike Pence – he is after all a public figure, who could be a frequent target for such accusations – it’s ridiculous and impractical for the rest of the world. Many of us work in office environments; many of us are supervisors who have to manage both males and females; many of us work in career fields that demand briefings, meetings, training sessions, and mentorships for members of the opposite sex. Many of us work in career fields that require interaction with customers, and we don’t have time to derp about what is between said customer’s legs.

Acting professionally has nothing to do with what your interlocutor happens to be wearing that day. It has to do with the respect you have for her as a co-worker, briefer, manager, and human being. It also has everything to do with simple human decency. Some men have it, and some men don’t. But to blame a victim for CAUSING another person’s inappropriate behavior, is taking a large, steaming dump on personal responsibility, self control, and free will.

If I were a man, I’d be insulted that someone would contend that I have so little upbringing, maturity, professionalism, and self-control, that I would violate a woman merely because she’s wearing a short skirt.

But since I’m a woman, I will simply and cheerfully give people like that hag Kapture and Walsh, and especially this troglodyte meat sack Bill Bryan, the one-finger salute.