I’m sure you’ve heard that the creature formerly known as Bradley Manning – a convicted felon now known as Chelsea, who stole hundreds of thousands of classified documents from the military and fed them to that unwashed, arrogant megalomaniac Julian Assange, and who spent some time in the pokey for it before being set free on the world by Barack Obama – has decided he hasn’t gotten enough attention of late, so he has filed paperwork to run for the U.S. Senate as a Democrat. Will Chelsea be the newest Senator from Maryland?