In the next installment of the Kennedy Chronicles, we bring the story of Robert F. Kennedy, Jr. (RFKJ) and a dead bear. He picked up the dead cub from a roadside. He planned to skin it and save the meat. Instead, he left it in a park with a fictitious crime scene.

This guy (RFKJ) doesn’t belong in politics. He deserves his own reality show instead.

Why is RFKJ telling the dead bear story now? Apparently, the New Yorker found out about it. They plan to publish a damaging story about RFKJ, and this little tidbit will be included. RFKJ is attempting to preempt damage control.

Looking forward to seeing how you spin this one, @NewYorker… pic.twitter.com/G13taEGzba

— Robert F. Kennedy Jr (@RobertKennedyJr) August 4, 2024

Robert just told Roseanne so many things in this short story. I am not a detective or criminal investigator, but I have listened to enough podcasts on criminal behavior to spot when someone isn’t being truthful with the whole story. /joke

Although the tall tale he just confessed to is bizarre, you know those Kennedys, though—always forthright with all the details, all the time.

Granted, and thankfully, this was a bear and not a human being. Would Kennedy still be sitting on this story if the New Yorker hadn’t written its article?

And I do have a problem with him saying that a woman in a van in front of him hit and killed the bear. But that’s just me. We’ll move on.

Weird and Wild

But you must admit that RFKJ has some weird and wild things going on. This bear story isn’t the first thing he’s had to come up with an explanation for—parasites dying in his brain and eating a dog, to name a few.

It’s the latest bizarre incident in Kennedy’s quixotic campaign that has divided his famous family and left Republicans and Democrats alike concerned about his potential impact on the presidential contest. Kennedy has acknowledged a parasite that lodged in his brain and died. He denied eating a dog after a friend shared a photo with Vanity Fair magazine showing Kennedy dramatically preparing to take a bite of a charred animal; Kennedy said it was a goat. – The Washington Examiner

If you don’t want to watch the video and listen to Kennedy recount the story, here is the gist of it from the Washington Examiner. But you really should take the time to listen to the man tell it himself.

In the video, Kennedy recounts the story to actress Roseanne Barr. He says he was heading to a falconry excursion with friends when a woman driving ahead of him hit and killed the young bear with her vehicle. He says he put it in his own vehicle, intending to skin it and eat the meat, but the day got away from him.

Eventually, he says, he was in Manhattan and needed to get the bear carcass out of his vehicle. His friends, fueled by alcohol, concocted the Central Park plan as a prank, he said, adding he was not drunk himself. At the time, bicycle accidents were getting significant media attention, so Kennedy and his friends thought it would be funny to make it look like the bear was hit by a bicycle. – The Washington Examiner

The rest of the story says that Kennedy woke up the next day to see the bear incident all over the news. And he was worried because his prints were all over that bike. Kennedy told Roseanne that the story eventually just fizzled out.

Or could it be that law enforcement realized who they were dealing with when the prints returned and made an arrangement? That’s just a question.

Check out the news archive footage from when this happened decades ago.

If you’ve listened to RFKJ tell this story, do you also wonder when he would find the time to take the bear home to skin it and store the meat? Or even if he had planned to arrange to drop it off to someone else to do all that butchering? RFKJ apparently had a full day ahead of him with the event he talked about, a dinner, and then he had to go to the airport. Come on.

However, Kennedy and his buddies had enough time to create a stupid story and plant the bear and the bike in Central Park.

And why does RFJK think that rednecks go around putting dead bears in parks and creating false crime scenes with bicycles? This guy with the drama!

Has anyone heard from his Vice President candidate lately? Remember her? Nicole Shanahan?

We all know that Robert F. Kennedy, Jr is running as an Independent for the 2024 Presidential candidacy. The dude isn’t going to win the Presidency, but he would make one hell of a reality star.

Feature Image: Robert F. Kennedy Jr/Gage Skidmore/Flickr/License CC BY-SA 2.0/edited in Canva Pro