I’m starting to feel like a one-woman anti-feminist crusader. It’s getting kind of tiring. Thankfully, being an anti-feminist doesn’t require too much time and effort, especially seeing as how I can skip out on the strain of being constantly outraged over trivial, stupid things.

The latest thing to drive them over the edge? A McDonald’s ad. Check it out:

This is apparently incontrovertible evidence that sexism is alive and well in the United States, because clearly the point McDonald’s was making was that all women are just stupid little sex objects. At least, according to Feministing:

Pretending to be smart and serious is hard stuff. All of that faking knowledge takes a toll on our tiny lady brains. But don’t worry, McDonald’s is here to let you know that you don’t have to wear flats and read books anymore!

I feel vomity.

And Jezebel:

There’s a new McDonald’s commercial (which comes to our attention via a reader tip) called “Intellectuals.” It begins with two women “reading” newspapers in an upscale, Starbucksian-establishment. The first woman says, “You know, I heard McDonald’s is making lattes now.” The other woman says: “McDonald’s? Well that’s just…it’s fantastic!” Woman 1 replies: “Now we don’t have to listen to jazz all day long!” Woman 2 concurs: “I can start wearing heels again!” Eventually, one woman admits, “I don’t know where Paraguay is!” Get it? They’re sick of pretending to be classy, café-loving intellectual ladies. They want to be “regular” American women! In other words, they want to be idiots.

The spot was discussed on Marketplace last week. AdWeek’s Barbara Lippert says: “It really seems to be in the Sarah Palin moment. Because all that is about anti-intellectualism and shootin’ and huntin’… And this is, you know, ‘Oh, we really always hated Starbucks, and thank God for McDonald’s and a real American option.'” And trend-watcher Faith Popcorn agrees, claiming: “It’s adapting kinda the campaign approach.” In fact, the commercial seems offensive on many levels.

So see, not only is the ad SEXIST!!, but it’s also (surprise!) Sarah Palin’s fault! She’s just such a gosh-darn anti-intellectual.

I really wonder about feminists. Isn’t it tiring, having to constantly summon up this kind of mock outrage over idiotic things, day in and day out? I mean, seriously. It’s not like there aren’t more important things for feminists to be worried about… like female genital mutilation, Sharia law in the Middle East (and now… Britain!), women getting killed in honour killings… but I guess I’m glad that feminists are concentrating on what really matters: McDonald’s commercials.

And I think they kind of missed the point on this one anyway. I didn’t see anything sexist in the ad. What I did see was a HUGE bitchslap to expensive, snooty coffee chains like Starbucks. Starbucks, and the entire atmosphere in there, is so annoying. Of course, liberal elites looove Starbucks. Maybe that’s what really bothers them, that McDonald’s insulted one of their sacred cows. But walking into Starbucks is always a little odd. You’ve got the “baristas”, who I think are required upon their hire to dye their hair some weird shade not found in nature, and have at least three facial piercings (it’s a plus to have an extra-long goatee if you’re a guy) — not to mention the prerequisite surly face and unfriendly demeanor. As for the customers, everyone in Starbucks is typically completely silent, everyone completely focused on their laptops, or their New Yorker magazine, or whatever the trendy pastime du jour is. No one interacts. No one talks. Everyone sits there, basking in their intellectual superiority. And then on top of that, you’ve got the crazy drinks and the even crazier prices. I mean, jeez — you get these outlandish orders like, I don’t know, decaf caramel nutmeg latte with skim milk and hazelnut topping and extra foam that cost some ridiculous amount like $12.95 — for a cup of freaking coffee!

The entire Starbucks atmosphere is what McDonald’s was ridiculing. Sure, there are people who are into that — usually college kids who are going through their bratty “I’m so hip and cool” phase — but most people have better things to do with their time and money than sit around for hours in a coffeeshop pretending to read trendy magazines and spend copious amounts of money on overpriced coffee. And most people will watch that McDonald’s commercial and laugh, because they understand what McDonald’s is saying right away. Hey, come to our place and get a cheap coffee, served by friendly cashiers (NOT baristas), be in and out in a second, and hey, you don’t have to worry about pretending to be trendy while you’re at it!

But, as usual, the feminists miss the boat. Because women are featured in this ad instead of men, it is clearly SEEEEEXIIIIST!!!

Well, I guess when I think about it, isn’t this a much better use of their time anyway? Much better to shriek about McDonald’s ads, abortion on demand, and the horrors of abstinence pledges than the true oppression women face in the world. Let the grown-ups handle the big girl stuff, and the tweeners can pout about the pretend stuff.