Of course, you wouldn’t know any of this if you only paid attention to the mainstream media, but believe it or not, things are getting better — through no action, obviously, taken by the Democrats currently in power. The do-nothing Congress has done just that, nothing, and miraculously, things are slowly recovering:

The dollar surged to a two-year high against the pound and a six-month peak against the euro on Friday, as fears about spreading economic gloom triggered a sell-off in commodities.

Against sterling, the US currency notched up its 11th consecutive day of gains – its longest uninterrupted rise in more than 35 years – as markets became increasingly convinced that the US was best-placed to weather the global downturn.

The strong dollar rebound undermined sentiment in the gold market, where prices fell below $800 for the first time this year to $774.90 a troy ounce, almost a quarter lower than early March’s record $1,030.80.

Prices for crude oil, platinum, copper, aluminium, corn and soyabeans have also retreated from records hit this year, prompting speculation that commodity prices have reached a turning point.

“The golden age when commodity prices could only go up is gone,” said Marco Annunziata, chief economist at Unicredit.

Military tensions between Russia and Georgia have offered little support to the price of gold, while oil prices have continued to fall in spite of interruptions to two key pipelines carrying crude from the Caspian sea to Turkey.

The long-running surge in commodities and resulting inflationary pressures had been a main factor in slowing global economic activity – playing a bigger role than global financial turmoil, for instance, in the eurozone. The eurozone economy shrank in the second quarter for the first time since the launch of the euro in 1999, while Japan’s economy contracted 0.6 per cent, its worst performance for seven years. The US staged at least a modest recovery in the same period.

Gosh, who would imagine that the dollar would be experiencing its longest uninterrupted rise in 35 years? That so does not fit in with the doom-and-gloom outlook that liberals and the mainstream media like to espouse. I mean, jeez, aren’t we supposed to be in the middle of a depression?? This is just so untimely! Couldn’t possibly have people feeling optimistic and in control of their futures, right? Better have them panicked and afraid so that they’ll run to the government to fix it.

Of course, it’s such a coincidence that the market does better whenever the government stops interfering. I wonder why that happens.

Also interesting: everyone else in the world “hates” us, but whenever they need rescuing, who is it they come running to? Oh, that’s right! The United States. Got it.

But don’t worry, folks. We’ll get back to your regularly scheduled programming here shortly. Don’t you dare get optimistic about the economy… it’s going to plummet any day now, I tell you, plummet!

Hat Tip: Purple Avenger at Ace of Spades