Next post
I’ve been hearing some smack being talked about the Marines here, and let me tell you — the Marines are THE BEST team to be on for the Project Valour-IT fundraising competition. The only real competition we have is the Army, and come on, who really thinks the Army can compete with the Marines? But, as per tradition, the USMC team is the smallest of the group, just like they’re the smallest among the branches. But don’t confuse the smallest with the weakest. The Marines are the smallest branch and we’re the smallest team, but we are undoubtedly the strongest, the best trained, and the most spirited.
With that said, here are ten reasons why the Marines are the best. OOH-RAH!
1. Marines have the best uniforms, hands down. And as everyone knows, chicks really dig a guy in uniform.
2. Marines know how to fight. That’s why they’re called America’s 911 force:
In the true spirit of “jointness” I offer the following as “Everything you need to know about differences in service culture. All in good fun, of course.
US Marine Corps Rules for Gunfighting
1. Be courteous to everyone, friendly to no one.
2. Decide to be aggressive ENOUGH, quickly ENOUGH.
3. Have a plan.
4. Have a back-up plan, because the first one probably won’t work.
5. Be polite. Be professional. But, have a plan to kill everyone you meet.
6. Do not attend a gunfight with a handgun whose caliber does not start with a “4.”
7. Anything worth shooting is worth shooting twice. Ammo is cheap. Life is expensive.
8. Move away from your attacker. Distance is your friend. (Lateral & diagonal preferred.)
9. Use cover or concealment as much as possible.
10. Flank your adversary when possible. Protect yours.
11. Always cheat; always win. The only unfair fight is the one you lose.
12. In ten years nobody will remember the details of caliber, stance, or tactics. They will only remember who lived.
13. If you are not shooting, you should be communicating your intention to shoot.Navy SEAL Rules For Gunfighting
1. Look very cool in sunglasses.
2. Kill every living thing within view.
3. Return quickly to looking cool in latest beach wear.
4. Check hair in mirror.US Army Ranger Rules For Gunfighting
1. Walk in 50 miles wearing 75 pound pack while starving.
2. Locate individuals requiring killing.
3. Request permission via radio from “Higher” to perform killing.
4. Curse bitterly when mission is aborted.
5. Walk out 50 miles wearing a 75 pound rucksack while starving.Army Rules for Gunfighting
1. Select a new beret to wear.
2. Sew combat patch on right shoulder.
3. Change the color of beret you decide to wear.US Air Force Rules For Gunfighting
1. Have a cocktail.
2. Adjust temperature on air-conditioner.
3. See what’s on HBO.
4. Determine “what is a gunfight.”
5. Request more funding from Congress with a “killer” PowerPoint presentation.
6. Wine & dine ‘key’ Congressmen, invite DOD & defense industry executives.
7. Receive funding, set up new command and assemble assets.
8. Declare the assets “strategic” and never deploy them operationally.
9. Tell the Navy to send the Marines.US Navy Rules For Gunfighting
1. Go to Sea.
2. Drink Coffee.
3. Watch porn.
4. Send the Marines.KEITH J. PAVLISCHEK
COLONEL, U.S. MARINES3. Being the smallest of the services forces us to be creative. Marines fight smarter, not harder. Jim Mattis wasn’t kidding when he said the Marine style is a blend of chivalry and ferocity: no better friend, no worse enemy.
4. The Marine Corps Silent Drill Team. Poetry in motion:
5. Tradition: we still celebrate ours. Mess nites, dinings in and out, St. Barbara’s day and the Marine Corps Ball: no one celebrates their rich history with more flair and elan than the Marine Corps. We still dress for dinner, we still pull out cigars and the smoking lamp for the men (and sometimes the ladies!).
We still light candles in memory of fallen comrades and those who have been wounded in the service of this nation. We do not forget. If you’ve ever been invited to a Marine Ball, don’t pass up the opportunity to attend. Those of us who have passed the quarter century mark may roll our eyes a bit, but we still go every year and still tear up when the same old passages are read. What began on November 10, 1775 in Tun Tavern is still remembered in giant ballrooms, decorated hangars, and dingy conference rooms all over this planet. Marines gather as one family to celebrate that which unites and binds us: a love of Corps, country, and above all, each other.
6. Esprit de corps: Which, as you should know, is no cheese-eating surrender monkey Phrench-sounding label, but something each Marine takes to heart on the day he or she finally earns the right to be called “Marine”. Every Marine is a rifleman. To call the average Marine a soldier, troop, sailor, or airman to is risk a speedy and ungentle correction. There are only Marines, an appellation which (unlike soldiers, sailors, or airmen) is always capitalized. Now *that’s* respect.)
7. Toughest mascot. Think about it:
Army: a mule
Air Force: a stinkin’ bird?
Navy: ummm… a goat
Marines: a bulldog. Nuff said.8. Marine PT. Did the HVES mention that we’re just better-looking?
9. Marine wives. There is an old Spanish saying, “No hay rosas sin espinas.” I think it fits Marine wives well: tough, but tender; beautiful but enduring. On the day my husband finally leaves the Corps, my most precious memories will be of the officer and enlisted wives I have been privileged to work with, laugh with, cry with, and share this wacky thrill ride that is military life.
10. The Navy-Marine Corps team: as much as we love to rib the Navy, we couldn’t do our job without them. On any Marine base, along with green you’ll see Navy khaki. Navy corpsmen go to battle with us and dress our wounds. They are at once healers, life savers, and soldiers as tough and brave as any Marine. Navy chaplains pray with us and bury our dead. They weep with us and help us to try and make sense of the incomprehensible.
And it is Navy ships which carry us to distant shores so we can do what we do best: respond as America’s 9/11 force. They provide devastating firepower on target when we need it. We are proud to be a part of the sea service. But that said….until November 11th…
Beat Navy!
As the smallest service, what we need to do to win is spread the word far and wide. So please, email your favorite bloggers and ask them: “Why aren’t you on the Marine team”?
We’re still looking for a few good bloggers. It’s a good cause.
Spread the word and invite your favorite bloggers to join the Marine team. If you have a blog, sign up. And if you haven’t yet, make sure you donate to the United States Marines team!!!
Mark says: First of all, I never served in the military. Therefore I have no right to disparage any branch of the armed forces. All service personnel seem to resent each other, usually saying the other had it more easy then they did and vice-versa.
My late father absolutely despised the Marines, with what I feel was genuine resentment over how their place in history had been established in the South Pacific during WWII. My reasoning behind this has to do with a television program that was on a few years ago. It was about this researcher who was planning on hunting down the remains of a plane that crashed in the jungles of New Guinea. At the time of the crash, ca.1944, a rescue attempt was made. All the crew(8) had perished, but only 6 remains were recovered, the pilot and co-pilot not included. Eventually the co-pilot’s remains were located but not the pilot. Before the researcher was due to leave, he sat down with family members, 2 sisters and a son, of the pilot. One of the sisters wanted to know why their brother was in New Guinea at all, being that he was in the Army Air Corps. The researcher said that the Army had a rather sizable force at Nadzab. The woman interrupted by asking why the Army was there in the first place, since she had always thought the Marines had done all the fighting, most notably in Iwo Jima!!! I told my dad about this and he gave me one of his patented expressions, the one that read, “see, what have I been saying all along.”
Outside of the Army guards units in the Phillipines and the Bataan Death March, the Army presence was overshadowed by Iwo Jima.
Knott Buyinit says: Cute, Cassy, but if you think Marines are better trained than Seals, Rangers, or Air Force Combat Search and Rescue guys, you’ve got another think coming. Not downing Marine training, but let’s be real, here.
Knott the rationing of new training and equipment goes like this:
first Spec Ops “field tests” Basicly they play with it till they break it.
then it goes to the Army where we did break it.
then it goes to the Air force where they clean and fix what we broke.
then it goes to the navy where they….well….stroke it.
then it goes to the Marines. They look at it and say “ug unga bunga me make kill now?”
Mark I know of resentment between the services. But that is few and far between. Yes they might be legit in some cases. When I was in I worked with Marines and Navy Corpmen. Damn fine men. Well trained and motovated. I enjoyed every min I spent withe them.
Oh and Cassy?
1. Walk in 50 miles wearing 75 pound pack while starving.
2. Locate individuals requiring killing.
3. Request permission via radio from “Higher” to perform killing.
4. Curse bitterly when mission is aborted.
5. Walk out 50 miles wearing a 75 pound rucksack while starving.
Just about right. Except At John Wayne High the rucks were 100lbs the road marches were 100 miles. But we were starving….
Teairlton Frady says: Nice website. Wish all could see the humor. I know that all services deserve respect. I know that all who serve their country are deserving of respect, also that on the battle field we all have a job to do and do it to our best.
What you do is done in good taste and for a great cause, thank you.
Let’s all enjoy this teasing and commraderee while we can, the time to fight is usally close at hand and generally lacks humor.
SEMPER FI!
Frank says: I’m a 30-year Air Force retiree and occasionally read your blog, Cas. I’m certainly not ashamed of the AF and could write paragraphs defending its combat record. That’s not my point, however. I totally agree with your observations about the Marine’s esprit de corps, their training regimen and their traditions. I was envious of those attributes when on active duty and wished that the AF had had the same.
FWIW, I think all the services have their strengths. I was raised NAVY!
I married a Marine. My Grandfather was Army all the way. Served in WWII.
I have a cousin in the Air Force. Also, my best friend in the Marine Corps was an Air Force brat 🙂
Having completed several joint tours, I think each service brings its own unique perspective to the table. People make fun of Jarheads and that’s OK. Mostly, it’s all in good fun.
When the rubber hits the road, we’re all on the same team. I’m just glad we have Cassy on our team! I wouldn’t want to go up against her in a fight 🙂
7 Comments