Paladin offers you a moment’s respite from the lunacy in DC to bring you a moment of lunacy from Portland, OR. That enlightened city, in its woke wisdom has decided to ban urinals in public buildings in order to strike a mighty blow against the Patriarchy. America’s most Stalinist Metropolis has declared: all Eloi and Morlocks must squat and drop samewise. Doubtless Portland’s legions of homeless nut–cutlets and junkies will be excused. Compliance is only for the potty-dependent bourgeoisie.