Most Bay Area locals automatically assume that other Bay Area locals are liberals. As a Bay Area resident, I’m usually tempted to let said locals assume as much about me.

Why? Because if said locals learn that I’m not a liberal, they are liable to swing in the far opposite direction and assume I’m the scum of the earth. It seems that’s a reality for conservatives living in the Bay Area: you’re either a progressive, or you’re a sewer-licking, puppy-burning, antichrist Nazi cave troll.