It’s official: the 2018 Grammy Awards attracted the fewest eyeballs evah. Not only that, the numbers represented the worst viewership in CBS’s history for awards shows.

How bad was it?

The ratings were down 24% just since last year. Right down the crapper.

Let me show you my shocked face.

Oh, the demographic wizards try to explain it away. Maybe, they say, it was because the show was so long. Or maybe it was because the broadcast got moved to January. And . . eh, they’re willing to entertain the idea that all the politics may have turned viewers off.

Here’s what you missed, if you didn’t tune in:

Yeah, turning off half the viewing public who voted for Trump was probably not the smartest move on the part of the Grammys. Most normal people — unless you’re a diehard Hillary devotee — no longer want to see the World’s Most Unaware Woman beclown herself again.

But there’s more.

Wasn’t this supposed to be the #MeToo and #TimesUp Grammys, complete with women in white, supporting the harassed and beleaguered sisterhood?

Yeah, about that.

Guess how many women won a major award at last night’s Grammys? Points if you said only one. Alessia Cara won for Best New Artist. I’m old, I know, but I remember when the Best New Artist Award was the Kiss o’ Death for the nascent careers of young artists. They seemed to dive bomb after getting this Major Award. Cristopher Cross, anyone?

But, one big award did go to Ed Sheeran, he of the red hair and nerd glasses, who won Best Pop Performance. It was for a song about having sex with a drunk woman.

The Grammys also nominated hip-hop “artist” (notice how I use that in quotes) Kendrick Lamar, who croons romantic lyrics like this:

‘Girl, I can buy yo’ ass the world with my paystub, Ooh that p*ssy good, won’t you sit it on my taste bloods?’

‘I’m so f***ing sick and tired of the Photoshop.. show me somethin’ natural like ass with some stretch marks. Still will take you down right on your mama’s couch in Polo socks.’

Stuff you want to hear played at your daughter’s wedding, isn’t it?

Grammy viewers were also treated to a raunch-fest put on by singer Rihanna, who was aided and abetted by DJ Khaled, who did little more than scream and shout. Rihanna gave a gyrating, crotch-grabbing performance while singing “Do you wanna see me naked, naked, naked?”

But it’s all about revering the sisterhood, right? Respect me, I’m wearing white! Boo-hoo-hoo, I’ve been sexually abused—oh, lemme show you what I got! Wanna see me naked?

Such hypocrisy led Piers Morgan to write:

Because let’s be perfectly frank: it’s the single most sexist, misogynist and abusive awards show of them all, celebrating many of the most sexist, misogynist and abusive people in an amoral industry of spectacular proportions.

Exactly. Sunday night’s Grammy Awards was one big turd of a show, swirling the toilet bowl only to be flushed away with all the other crap and hypocrisy our entertainment betters try to foist upon us.

So what was I doing? Oh, I was watching TV, but I was catching another installment of “Victoria” on PBS. You know, about the 19th century British monarch who serves as a punchline for the hedonists performing at the Grammy Awards. But she, unlike Rihanna and all those #TimesUp babes in white, was a real lady. And we still remember her, and will for generations to come. The Grammy “artists?” We are not amused.